Conversations with Andy

Me: So, little miss muffet sat on a tuffet eating her “curtain way”? What’s a curtain way?

{note; English is not my first language, a fact which Andy enjoys abusing when it amuses him}

Andy: it’s a cookie.

Me: Really? Never heard of a cookie like that before. Are you taking the piss?

Andy: {grins} Ok, no, it’s a ‘curtain way’, like she’s eating while pulling the curtain {by the window} away. 

Tam: What? That makes no sense. Come on, what does it mean?

Andy: … it’s a cookie.

Tam: Ok, so the lyrics are not ‘curtain way’ are they?

Andy: yes yes, they are; miss muffet, is eating on curtain way, like a road ..

Tam: Argh, ok, I’ll look it up on the internet, what the actual lyrics are …

Tam looks up lyrics on iPhone

Tam: Oh, miss muffet is not eating a ‘curtain way’ but her curds and whey. What are curds?

Andy: A curd, is a Kurdish person.  

Tam: I’m going to kill you.


A few hours later.

Tam: Wait, miss muffet sits on a ‘tuffet’, what’s a tuffet?

Andy: It’s a cute word for something ‘tough’. Like, she’s sitting on something hard, but because it’s a cute children’s song, they call it a ‘tuffet’ like a ‘toughie’/ ‘tuffet’.

Tam: Oh go away.


I had to look up the meaning of ‘tuffet’ on the internet just now as apparently Andy didn’t know what it was either!

Tuffet, pouffe or hassock are all terms for a piece of furniture used as a footstool or low seat.


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