55 Life Lessons from someone who just turned 40! :)

 turned40


So I recently turned 40. What? That’s like I have to be a proper grown up now right? ;) Luckily when I asked all my instagram and FB friends that question the dominant answer was; “Noooo don’t grow up! Stay YOUOUOUO!” :) Which was an awesome answer. Don’t I have great friends? So for funsies, because I’ve turned 40 I thought, let me list 40, no, 55 wise life lesson thingies I’ve learned in my 40 years of life on this pretty pretty earth. If you have any you’d like to add, please leave your wise life lesson thingie(s) in the comments below! :) I’d love to know what wise thing you’ve learned in your x amount of time on this earth that you’d like to share with us! Go! :)

Here is my ‘wise life lessons thingies’ list:

  1. Life is hard, life is joy, life is fun, life is MESSY, life is sad, life is bliss; you gotta keep going, no feeling is permanent or final.
  2. Everyone struggles, everyone really tries hard, most of the time they try their best. Everyone needs our compassion and understanding.
  3. It’s totally ok to hide under blankets with buckets full of chocolate, wine and basketballs pretending to be a sloth or hedgehog when you’re depressed or sad.
  4. Kindness is holy.
  5. Feel your feelings. Allow & notice your feelings, all your feelings; give space to them, they need a way out and they need to be heard; it’s super good for your health. Bonus: painful ones leave you sooner if you feel them instead of repressing them; irony, life haz it.
  6. Build a great relationship with yourself. Learn to know, understand, love thyself.
  7. Cheese is laced with crack cocaine.
  8. Get to know your heart. Follow it. Don’t confuse heart messages with mind messages, this one can be tricksy, gollum knowssss.
  9. Try empathy instead of sympathy when responding to people, empathy creates connection, sympathy less so. Read all of Brene’s stuff or check out NVC/ Marshall Rosenberg on that one.
  10. Break the rules. Sometimes smash ‘m.
  11. Embrace diversity for a healthier heart, mind, society and earth.
  12. There are numerous magical worlds to be found in some amazing made up stories: read books.
  13. Kindness is sacred.
  14. Let go, be present, surrender to what is.
  15. There are entirely too many calories in 1 tiny peanut.
  16. Calories don’t matter as much as love, connection and the light inside people.
  17. Don’t waste your time on finding the one matching sock. Odd socks are quirky, fun and save you time trying to find the matching one that is clearly in a black hole somewhere having dropped through a crack in the space-time continuum. You’re. never. gonna. find. it.
  18. You are innately worthy. They are innately worthy. We are innately worthy. I am innately worthy. Your abilities, skills and achievements do not equate your worthiness. You were born worthy and always will be worthy. Forever and ever. There is nothing you can do, no matter how hard you try to suck at life to make you unworthy.
  19. Find community and connection with other like minded humans. You need each other.
  20. Living in community is hard, you really have to connect over tedious things like: ‘why did you not put the lid back on the toothpaste tube?‘ & ‘who used up all the milk?’ and ‘hey, who farted?’. Still it’s worth while to find your tribe.
  21. Art & music can help you heal.
  22. Flowers too.
  23. You gotta be gentle with yourself and others, always gentle.
  24. Rainbows, unicorns, glitter, spirulina and coconut oil are awesome.
  25. The most violent people are often the ones who need the most compassion, love and understanding.
  26. It’s ok if you can’t be the one to give it to them.
  27. Humans can do the most mind-blowingly awesome amazing things.
  28. Humans can do the most shockingly horrifyingly awful things.
  29. It’s ok to say no. It’s ok to say yes. It’s ok to give up, it’s ok to keep trying.
  30. Every single person in the world has something special to give.
  31. Thoughts can lie and distract. Examine them, don’t fight or repress them. Just watch them fly by.
  32. The media’s goal is to sell you things. Question what you read in the papers and what you watch on the news. Be informed and don’t buy the media’s messages about what they think will make you happy. Hint: it’s not a new car, a better body, the next anti-wrinkle cream or more guinea pigs, ok maybe more guinea pigs but not the cream.
  33. Hold your own. Shine your incredibly wild beautiful bananaballs amazing big beautiful BRIGHT LIGHT.
  34. Stand in your truth. Examine your truth.
  35. Kindness is cool.
  36. You have a soul, or rather: you are a soul inside a human body.
  37. Everyone has a different truth. There is no ‘one truth’.
  38. Be open to new ideas, change, growth and purple trousers.
  39. Take magnesium supplements, apparently we are all magnesium deficient. It’s helped me with depression. Check with your doctor first though!
  40. Turning 40 is an odd paradox where you feel that the age 40 commands some kind of respect like; ‘wow, you made it all this way without even dying and you managed to pay bills and cook some semi healthy food without setting the kitchen on fire, sometimes (I did once set a microwave on fire, oops), and you didn’t even end up in prison and most of your clothes don’t have holes in them’, but on the other hand you are painfully aware that you know absolutely nothing and you feel like a massive kid inside and you stare wild eyed (and WIDE eyed) at how ‘all the other people manage to be so responsible and grown up and have proper jobs like being an accountant and smoke pipes or cigars and talk about the stock market or the rise and fall of the economy and they understand insurance, navigation, peak oil, VAT, mortgages and pensions and they drink sophisticated drinks like martinis’ and this is a terrible & long looong run on sentence that proves I am not allowed to be 40 quite yet. :D  So yeah: 40 is a little bit of a lie, or a charade or a mask you put on that you can intimidate younger people with, but inside, oh inside you knoooooow it’s ALL one massive big joke!! Nevertheless, let’s continue on with listing my wise life lesson thingies. You must respect my opinions and views, now that I’m 40. haha.
  41. Love open-heartedly even if you risk being shattered into a million little pieces of broken love puddly sadness. It’s true that it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. You are not a rock nor an island, pain and sadness are part of the deal. So are bliss and joy. Give lots of hugs. Smile with your eyes. And if you’re finding it hard to find people to love on, start with yo’self, the people will come.
  42. There are no mistakes only awesome learning opportunities.
  43. Corporations should not have the same rights as human people.
  44. It’s ok to express yourself even if others around you think it’s ‘too loud, frivolous or a waste of time’. Sing, paint, dance, run, cook, bake, pottery, write, poetry, crochet, knit, be a make up artist, a hair stylist, a landscaper; express your beautiful self.
  45. Cry as deeply and loudly as you need when you’re sad. Throw plates, scream in pillows. Get it all out. Also; if you’re male: you too; cry, feel sad, feel your feels dude. It’s braver and healthier than the other option: pretending you’re all hard and stuff. It’s really not been very fair on men at all; all that ‘you gotta be strong & hard and be the man and you can never show your feelings because that equates weakness’; b*llsh*t.’ Be strong and brave: feel your feels. X
  46. Slow down. Notice. Breathe. Slowly. Slow. Be quiet, listen. Listen.
  47. Go, with the flow. The flow likes you to go with it. Flow baby. Resistance = futile.
  48. Nonviolent Communication (NVC) can save lives and heal the world.
  49. What you resist has a tendency to persist. Allow the unfolding of life.
  50. You can do more than you think you can.You can do this. I believe in you.
  51. Fame, fortune, physical beauty, material possessions are seductive, attractive and sometimes helpful but they are also fleeting and fickle and will not solve all your problems or help you feel a deep inner peace and happiness (you gotta go spiritual for the latter).
  52. It’s ok to feel hopeless, angry, infuriated.
  53. People matter, animals matter, you matter, the earth matters.
  54. I suspect, the universe is alive and intelligent and loves us immeasurably. :)
  55. Life is but a dream.

Your turn!! :)

And thanks, the world, for having me for 40 years. I’ve had my ups and downs but am enjoying it here, thank you! <3

 

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