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April 16, 2018

Simple Steps to Self Empathy <3 Love note #17

By Tamara Laporte  |   in love notes  | Tags: steps to self empathy , love notes , willowing  


♥ Willowing Love Notes to Inspire Self Love & Self Care ♥


Hello sweet friends,

I hope you know how much you matter. How important you are. That I know how much you can sometimes struggle and try your hardest, your bestest to ‘do it right’. I see you. I hear you. I understand.

Today, I wanted to share some Simple Self Empathy Steps with you that I hope might help you when you feel upset, overwhelmed or stressed.

In times of upset, we often try to ‘push through’ and ‘get on with our lives’ instead of paying attention to what our body is trying to tell us. Feelings need your attention and love. Unmet needs, need your attention and love.

It’s absolutely important, if not imperative, to make space and time for feeling/ hearing/ understanding your feelings and needs and be with them, if only for a moment, in a compassionate, empathic way.

Bonus: when you actually pay attention to your feelings, even the negative ones (especially the negative ones!) they dissipate more quickly! An interesting paradox for sure. Pushing them down keeps them firmly sitting stubbornly inside your body waiting to be heard!

So, ready? Here are some simple steps you can take when you’re feeling stressed, upset or overwhelmed. Hope it helps you. I have a high res version of this poster too, you can print it out and hang up to remind you of the steps if you want to.

When you look for feelings, look for ‘sensations’ & ‘feelings’ in the body, they are different from thoughts (though it’s fine to notice those too!) Sensations could be: tingling/ heaviness/ emptiness/ tired. Feelings could be: sad/ scared/ frustrated/ worried/ weary/ panicked/ angry etc. (Check out a comprehensive feelings list here).

When looking for needs, go deeper and look for needs that are essential to life such as: to be understood, love, connection, belonging, for your intention to be seen, respect, care, consideration, rest, freedom, play, beauty, spaciousness, etc. (Check out a comprehensive needs list here).

Download the high resolution version of this poster here. You can print out for personal use. Feel free to forward to friends. <3

Much love,
xoox
Tam x


PS. If you want to work more on self love & self acceptance AND develop your creative skills whilst having tons of fun, please consider joining Life Book 2018. We started in January but you can absolutely still join us!

Life Book has been joined by over 19,500+ people since it first began in 2012. It’s had roaring success through teaching participants creativity and personal development skills.

People send us daily message expressing their gratitude and how much Life Book has helped them both creatively and personally. :) I  feel so blessed to be able to host such a powerful and life-enriching course each year! This year has started with an incredible BANG and YOU can still join now problem. :) It’s not too late, you get access to all previous content, get life long access AND you can download everything too, so you have the content for year to come! :) Hope to see you there!
xoox

The Willowing Love Notes Series aims to send you a love note every 1 – 2 weeks.
Its mission is to support you on your self love and self care journey.
I hope you enjoy it. <3

From my heart to yours:
you are truly loved.

Big hugs!


You may also like:

  • Free Downloadable Print: The wound is the place where the light enters you.

  • Simple Steps to Self Empathy <3 Love note #17

  • Tea and Cake with Gracie featuring Melissa Dinwiddie

Comments:

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Tamara Laporte

willowing

4,881 48,510

Mixed media artist, teacher and author. I don’t see all IG msgs. For enq pls email hello@willowing.org - Join A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales:

Bookworm Girl - In late 2014, I created a painting that became one of my favourites of all time. Not only for its cute quirky bookish girl and delicious textures in the background but because I felt it captured the pure magic of getting utterly lost in a good book really well.

As a kid, I was a ‘bookworm girl’, I read and read and read to the point my parents felt I was ‘too secluded’ and ‘should go out more’! But! I had books and friends in books and stories and excitement and adventures and wisdom and joy and humour and laughter and intrigue and mystery. Books provided so much solace for me, especially as someone who felt like an outsider who didn’t belong anywhere.

I belonged in the books with the weirdos, the heroes, the vampires & witches (hello Anne Rice!), the artists, the outcasts, the lonely ones hiding in secret gardens, the wise and wild old crones that lived in the forests with deer and cats, the seekers, the fighters, and the fierce souls who wore their hearts on their sleeves and never gave up.

I continued reading pretty much throughout my life though when smartphones entered the scene; I too became entranced by apps, games and social media and reading books got interrupted by the wave of technology. Until about 2 years ago I decided that I was no longer allowed my phone in my bedroom at night (my god the endless doom scrolling on TikTok did me no good) and so I ended up back on kindle and now I read again and I’m so so happy about it. I love disappearing into fantasy and letting the stories carry me away from the stresses of every day life for a while!

If you’re also a book lover (or recovering bookworm -haha), what stories swept you away? Which books still live inside you? Tell me your favourites, I’m always hunting for the next world to disappear into. 💫

This is day 19 of a ‘gentle return to social media’ read more about this practice here: http://bit.ly/3IHFxir 🌱

PS: I painted this before certain things came to light about J.K. Rowling and Neil Gaiman, which is why their books feature here.

Open
Bookworm Girl - In late 2014, I created a painting that became one of my favourites of all time. Not only for its cute quirky bookish girl and delicious textures in the background but because I felt it captured the pure magic of getting utterly lost in a good book really well. 

As a kid, I was a ‘bookworm girl’, I read and read and read to the point my parents felt I was ‘too secluded’ and ‘should go out more’! But! I had books and friends in books and stories and excitement and adventures and wisdom and joy and humour and laughter and intrigue and mystery. Books provided so much solace for me, especially as someone who felt like an outsider who didn’t belong anywhere. 

I belonged in the books with the weirdos, the heroes, the vampires & witches (hello Anne Rice!), the artists, the outcasts, the lonely ones hiding in secret gardens, the wise and wild old crones that lived in the forests with deer and cats, the seekers, the fighters, and the fierce souls who wore their hearts on their sleeves and never gave up.

I continued reading pretty much throughout my life though when smartphones entered the scene; I too became entranced by apps, games and social media and reading books got interrupted by the wave of technology. Until about 2 years ago I decided that I was no longer allowed my phone in my bedroom at night (my god the endless doom scrolling on TikTok did me no good) and so I ended up back on kindle and now I read again and I’m so so happy about it. I love disappearing into fantasy and letting the stories carry me away from the stresses of every day life for a while! 

If you’re also a book lover (or recovering bookworm -haha), what stories swept you away? Which books still live inside you? Tell me your favourites, I’m always hunting for the next world to disappear into. 💫

This is day 19 of a ‘gentle return to social media’ read more about this practice here: http://bit.ly/3IHFxir 🌱

PS: I painted this before certain things came to light about J.K. Rowling and Neil Gaiman, which is why their books feature here.

I sold the previous version of this painting already but filmed a lesson for creating cuties for it so I have another version of this cute doggo visited by a butterfly. It’s for sale too. Original painting by me! 😊 Email me on hello@willowing.org if interested xxx ♥️♥️♥️ 🐶

Open
I sold the previous version of this painting already but filmed a lesson for creating cuties for it so I have another version of this cute doggo visited by a butterfly. It’s for sale too. Original painting by me! 😊 Email me on hello@willowing.org if interested xxx ♥️♥️♥️ 🐶

Great glittering goblins! The first 1000 places have already sold out! Thank you for all your love, enthusiasm and excitement in response to this magical new course!! I’m befuddled with joy and thrilled to have such an amazing response!
Now, if you had hoped to join for the lowest price ever, then don’t worry; we have opened up another 500 spaces at the super low price of £109 GBP. So please get in there quickly if you want to grab A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales at this hugely discounted price, as spaces are selling fast!

Do not dilly dally, my dear, adventure favours the nimble-footed!
A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales
is waiting for you!
🧚✨🦄
JOIN ‘A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales ’ NOW!:
https://bit.ly/AYOM-Tam

Open
Great glittering goblins! The first 1000 places have already sold out!  Thank you for all your love, enthusiasm and excitement in response to this magical new course!! I’m befuddled with joy and thrilled to have such an amazing response! 
Now, if you had hoped to join for the lowest price ever, then don’t worry; we have opened up another 500 spaces at the super low price of £109 GBP. So please get in there quickly if you want to grab A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales at this hugely discounted price, as spaces are selling fast!

Do not dilly dally, my dear, adventure favours the nimble-footed!
A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales
is waiting for you!
🧚✨🦄 
JOIN ‘A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales ’ NOW!: 
https://bit.ly/AYOM-Tam

✨ The Magic Begins! ✨

Friends, I am SO THRILLED! We’re finally opening the enchanted gates to a new amazing creative experience! ✨🙌✨

A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales is here! For a limited time, the first 1000 magical souls can join for just £109 (normally £179). Crazy good deal!! ♥️♥️♥️ Hurry though, these spaces usually go fast!!

Explore over 65+ mixed media art lessons, dive into fairy tales, myth, folklore and every day magic! Paint dragons, castles, and everyday enchantment; all with the support of 30+ beloved artists and a kind-hearted community.

Secure your spot and let’s create a year of magic & wonder together!

See you there!!

(Link in comments)

#AYearOfMagic #MixedMediaArt #ArtClass #EarlyBird

Open
✨ The Magic Begins! ✨ 

Friends, I am SO THRILLED! We’re finally opening the enchanted gates to a new amazing creative experience! ✨🙌✨ 

A Year of Magic & Fairy Tales is here! For a limited time, the first 1000 magical souls can join for just £109 (normally £179). Crazy good deal!! ♥️♥️♥️ Hurry though, these spaces usually go fast!! 

Explore over 65+ mixed media art lessons, dive into fairy tales, myth, folklore and every day magic! Paint dragons, castles, and everyday enchantment; all with the support of 30+ beloved artists and a kind-hearted community.

Secure your spot and let’s create a year of magic & wonder together!

See you there!! 

(Link in comments) 

#AYearOfMagic #MixedMediaArt #ArtClass #EarlyBird

Black. 🖤

After I finished Senior School, I went to an Art Academy in Amsterdam for a year. I was massively proud to have been accepted into two art academies in Holland because it was pretty hard to get into them, only about 30/ 40 people got selected out of 100nds of applicants each year. To be accepted into two Art Academies was a huge deal. Sadly the experience was not one I enjoyed much at all.

Coming from a vibrant, colourful senior school where art classes were uplifting and fun, I was shocked to discover that at the academy, it almost seemed sport to the teachers to ‘break down their students emotionally’, supposedly to make us better artists. Even the building itself was grey, devoid of any joy or colour. It was baffling; a place meant for creativity felt so grim and dark. 😔

The professors, too, each had their own peculiar ‘rules’. I remember being told things like, “Never use black in your paintings, it’s not a colour,” or, “Don’t use purple, I hate purple.” Looking back now, it’s almost comical; if every teacher had a forbidden colour, soon we’d be left with none! The arbitrary rules piled up, until it seemed like you could break one just by picking up a brush.

But the ‘never use black’ rule really stuck with me for years. I avoided it religiously, until this painting.

Yes, black can be a tricky colour. It’s bold, sometimes harsh, and can easily overpower a piece. But, when used with intention, I think black adds a beautiful sense of depth, contrast, and harmony. In this painting, I love how the black brings weight and grounding, making the other colours sing even brighter. ✨🙌✨

I remember painting this piece in 2016 and feeling a sense of freedom. I let myself be looser and wilder; not only did I dare to bring in black, I also used fluorescent pinks, which can be just as challenging! Suddenly, all those ‘forbidden’ elements became a celebration.

I left the Art Academy after a year, feeling confused and a bit lost. For a while, they made me believe maybe art wasn’t for me after all. How sad, isn’t it, when a place meant to nurture creativity ends up clipping your wings? ... (continues in comments)

Open
Black. 🖤

After I finished Senior School, I went to an Art Academy in Amsterdam for a year. I was massively proud to have been accepted into two art academies in Holland because it was pretty hard to get into them, only about 30/ 40 people got selected out of 100nds of applicants each year. To be accepted into two Art Academies was a huge deal. Sadly the experience was not one I enjoyed much at all. 

Coming from a vibrant, colourful senior school where art classes were uplifting and fun, I was shocked to discover that at the academy, it almost seemed sport to the teachers to ‘break down their students emotionally’, supposedly to make us better artists. Even the building itself was grey, devoid of any joy or colour. It was baffling; a place meant for creativity felt so grim and dark. 😔 

The professors, too, each had their own peculiar ‘rules’. I remember being told things like, “Never use black in your paintings, it’s not a colour,” or, “Don’t use purple, I hate purple.” Looking back now, it’s almost comical; if every teacher had a forbidden colour, soon we’d be left with none! The arbitrary rules piled up, until it seemed like you could break one just by picking up a brush.

But the ‘never use black’ rule really stuck with me for years. I avoided it religiously, until this painting.

Yes, black can be a tricky colour. It’s bold, sometimes harsh, and can easily overpower a piece. But, when used with intention, I think black adds a beautiful sense of depth, contrast, and harmony. In this painting, I love how the black brings weight and grounding, making the other colours sing even brighter. ✨🙌✨ 

I remember painting this piece in 2016 and feeling a sense of freedom. I let myself be looser and wilder; not only did I dare to bring in black, I also used fluorescent pinks, which can be just as challenging! Suddenly, all those ‘forbidden’ elements became a celebration.

I left the Art Academy after a year, feeling confused and a bit lost. For a while, they made me believe maybe art wasn’t for me after all. How sad, isn’t it, when a place meant to nurture creativity ends up clipping your wings? ... (continues in comments)
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